Being in Love, or On Crack, Which is Worse?

Yesterday, a judge overturned the band on gay marriage in California.  Tomorrow is my 21^st wedding anniversary.   Considering I’m a man married to a man, and living in Los Angeles that’s like the 500 years of “wedded bliss.”    Here’s the funny thing.  You know what I want most for my anniversary?   I want my husband to forget it, so I can milk that guilt cow for a year.  What is wrong with this picture?  Love, that’s what’s wrong.

Love should be against the law.  It should be a felony.  It is FAR WORSE than any narcotic on the street.  In terms of achieving an end, crack whores pale in comparison to people in love.  When’s the last time you saw someone in a bad love affair nodded out peacefully in a doorway?  Never, that’s right, because a bad love will make you do anything, and everything, but sleep peacefully is not one of them.

Drugs don’t make people key people’s cars, call every number on somebody’s cellphone and pretend they’re from the census and ask questions like, “are you married”, “your height, weight, and age please…do you workout,”  My girlfriend Corinne, and her ex-husband, Jack, got into a fist fight over a kayak paddle, during their divorce, and they don’t even own a kayak, or like kayaking.  You tell me that aint love.  Love will make black folks eat watercress sandwiches, and white folks fry chitlins.  It’s  a terrible thing.  It destroys the mind.   It will make you believe some ridiculous lies.  My girlfriend’s old man told her that the reason he had so many women’s phone numbers was because he knew she wanted to have more female friends and he was trying to help her—and she believed the Negro—yes, she did.  

So, my wanting my husband to forget our anniversary so I can guilt trip him for a year is nothing—compared to what goes on with people in love—not to mention people who are married for a long time.  It’s a terrible thing, and there’s only one thing worse than being in love—and that’s not being in love, because as Janis Joplin put it, “one good man—it ain’t much it’s only every little thing.”